Bye all!

This was fun keeping up to date, but I can't update anymore as I have sold all my vehicles!
Thanks for reading!
David

Nobody loves messing around with an MGF for four months

In honestly the worst four months of my entire life, I finally finish meddling around with that meddlesome, finicky auto-mobile now known to my neighbours as 'you f*cking stupid car'.


In early December, I decide to relocate the MGF from my house to the destination I've been known to fiddle about with cars on now and then (my folk's driveway), and about the same time, a new engine appears! Those of you living in the UK from December - January will remember the consistently horrid weather. I remember lying on my back in snow, under an MGF, undoing seized bolts, rounding the heads off, and going through three angle grinder discs in a week. My hands now look like I've been playing 'Thumb War' with Freddy Krueger, and I am now contemplating permanently wearing gloves, as this takes the piss. There is a deep cut and scars on every bendable part of my poor, withered handies.

Here's a little breakdown of the past four months:

• I attempted to remove the whole engine from the top of the car, but found the bolts impossible to do from the top, so took the subframe out from underneath,

Cold weather pictured (all over)

Subframe = free engine trolley

• I treated and painted the subframe, with zinc primer, stonechip and 2 PACK PAINT. Come and get me FERRIC OXIDE!

• I did some bits on the engine, and put the gearbox on!

•  I put the engine in the subframe and put it back in the car!!

 

I readied everything, started the car, and was confronted with a loud tapping noise. Pushing the clutch down stopped the noise, which later revealed I'd forgotten to tighten the clutch plate bolts! I'm not taking the engine out again, I thought, so I left the car for a couple of weeks as I couldn't handle it again in this weather, and then came back a few days ago with a determined look on my grid, and spent six hours a day on it. Gearboxes are never nice, and this was no difference. Spent two days mating the gearbox up to the engine, and getting soaked in various engine fluids. :(

Also noticed the pipes were leaking, so replaced with S/S ones, which will never leak again, I tell you:

So after everything was DONE, I started the car up again, and had no drive. A quick check confirmed one driveshaft was out. Is THIS the END, I thought, as I drove the car up and down the driveway?

Yay!

 

 

 

The only job left to do now is to get the hydragas suspension pumped up, as there is about 3 inches clearance under the car. I could never drive it anywhere at that height (although it does look cool - I don't know why people don't lower their F's, it looks much better), it'd seesaw on the slightest bump in the road, and as I'm surrounded by speed bumps, there is NO chance I'd get out. So the garage man with the pump will have to come down.

Here's a picture of my Metro:

 

It's had everything changed, but is waiting for a slot so I can get it MOT'd and on the road. I've driven it and it is indeed superb to drive, it's like the Whizzkid but less rattly. For a 10 year old car design it feels solid and eager, the K-series suits the car excellently, it'd be better with the 1.8, but I think I'll leave that for a while. I can't wait to fill it up with petrol that costs £1.30 and rising, I hope it does good mpg.

Nobody loves a Rover

'Tis a sad moment in my car history as I say goodbye to my red Astra GSi after nearly 7 years of ownership. I wish I could've relayed it's final year in blog format, but I've been lacking enthusiasm with anything computer related, but here's the jist of of what has happened since I sold my Whizzkid.

• In June 2010, the original owner of the Whizzkid contacted me and said he wanted to buy the car back. I sold it to him for a tidy sum, and looking for a new car, I peeked out from my window and saw a sad shape - my Astra. I decided to get it back on the road,
• The car witnessed the road after having a paint job and several new bits,
• Shortly after witnessing said road, the engine killed itself,
• I sold the engine, and bought a V6, which I put in,
• I realised that V6's weren't that great, and as I no longer drove in a spirited fashion, I saw no point in 30mpg driving like a grandma, so left with the option of swapping the engine for another one in sub zero temperatures (see below), I put it up for sale,
• The car took ages to sell, and when I'd given up, someone came to view and drove it off,

And that's it really. There's been a lot going on, but I have another project on my hands:


It's a Rover Metro GTa with a complete GTi upgrade. I'm not sure on how it got upgraded, as it seems like it is a GTi with a pessimistic 'I'm not that great' complex. I won't delve on it too much, and just assume it's a GTi.

The differences between the GTa and the GTi are:

• GTi got the same front brakes as the MGF (vented), GTa got smaller solid brakes,
• GTi has damper support brackets on the front,
• GTi has a rear anti roll bar,
• GTi has lightening style interior, GTa has a different pattern,
• GTi has side skirts and front bumper extension, these were an option on the GTa,
• GTi came with seven spoke wheels, GTa had five spoke,
• GTi came with a 16v multipoint injection 1.4, this may have been an option on later GTa's, but they commonly came with a 1.4 8v SPi (or earlier ones came with a carb),

It probably also had a few typical povo Rover/BL extras like rubber floor mats, cigar lighter, etc.

I had bandied around with the idea of getting a Metro and putting my old MGF's engine into it, as they have the same subframe. I've had a mysterious history of wanting something and then have someone pop up with the car for pence, and local as well. This was the case here, and selling my Astra left a huge space open for something as small and economical as the li'l Metro. Who'd have thought something as undesirable and uncool as a Metro would have been so unwanted and so destined for the scrapyard. "LOL"

Bearing in mind the car had sat for over three years, and the previous owner bought it in 2000, I was unsure what I'd find. These have a reputation for rusting, and when I turned up I expected it to just comically break in two when I opened the door, but (touch lots of wood), preliminary inspection (lying on wet pavement to tap about underneath) showed it was quite solid. It's resting place has managed to protect it from the elements, as I believe gritting the road in the winter is the reason why so many cars rust away. It has it's rust, I managed to peek along the other side and saw a length of surface rust all the way on the sill and the corner of the door. As there is a 'guard dog' loose in the area where it has been stored, I didn't want to put my appendages into anymore dog dirties.
There are good points. The engine was a main worry. I bought new petrol and put a new battery on it, and it ran on the turn of the key (after priming it with some oil). A single tap from the lifter, but what a result there.

There's also about 50 marble tiles in the boot.

So, what am I getting myself into - here are my worries:

1. I may have not found a severe amount of corrosion,
2. The MOT tester will vomit in combined hysterics/terror as it creaks up on the ramp lift,
3. I'll tow it home and it'll fall into bits,

I'm not worried about having to replace most of the mechanical parts on the car like running gear, but I'm wary of the scrutiny of the MOT tester. They seem so strict these days, and I don't want to end up spending more on retests than I did on the car, and that money can go on new parts for it. I'm confident it'll be OK ... sort of!

I've started buying new stuff for the car, all genuine Rover parts. I guess a new lockset and an oil filter doesn't really constitute a complete restoration, but it's a start. And the fact I opened the car with the key from my MGF had me searching for part numbers. There's a constantly revolving line of NOS parts on ebay as all the stock dwindles and motor factors attempt to shift it on for pence. I've also ordered new brakes! Woohoo!

In the next week, I'll have the oil changed, the new brakes on, the underside undersealed, the rusty arches, sill and door cleaned up, the lockset put in, the engine bay valeted (jet washed), the seats through the washing machine, and possibly change a couple of old tyres. I'm aiming for an MOT on about Wednesday, or possibly earlier. I have purchased a new A-frame towing dolly, which will come to good use, as another worry was getting gripped by the filth being towed home behind another car.

In the meantime, I have been doing a lot of work on the MGF, which involves:

• Taking the entire subframe out,
• Taking the engine out,
• Completely renovating the subframe,
• Putting a new engine in,
• Putting everything back together again.

All this throughout another body breakingly cold winter. The whole thing took from mid December up until now. I've done a proper job, and taken things slowly. Also there are only a few hours of daylight. The only reason I have not finished, is because, in proper MGF fashion, things have broken along the way. The car also won't go into gear, so I've started to take the lot apart again (another couple of full days), to do something that should've taken 5 seconds in the first place - put the clutch release bearing on properly. Argh. I will update properly in coming posts, but I'm slowly realising I've done quite a bit over the past year.

If that's not enough, I cleared my garage out, and my black Astra sits in front of my house, almost looking like it's given up waiting to be put back on the road. It's definitely sick of me buying a string of red 2-door cars - losing the red Astra has given it some hope though!

Problematic MGF is (still) problematic

The days are long, the flowers are blooming, the skies are blue, and it's about that time of year where I start to turn the air blue. I made a conscious effort to avoid even opening a car's bonnet for any maintenance whatsoever in the winter months (which ended up with my coolant freezing - three times), which didn't happen. I'm not going to apologise for not updating as it's been SHITE.

I didn't make much progress through the winter, apart from aging further physically, and becoming more miserable, here's why:

1. It was the coldest winter for decades
2. It wouldn't stop snowing
3. The snow quickly turned to three inch thick ice
4. My new battery died in my Whizzkid
5. My starter motor died in my Whizzkid
6. My coolant froze three times (twice in Whizzkid, once in MGF)
7. I got laughed at when I was walking to McDonalds for a coffee at 1am, and I slipped on ice. But I didn't just slip on the ice, I kicked my leg above my head, with a painfully loud 'shout', before crashing onto my arse.
8. I had the worst car to drive in winter (Whizzkid).

The MGF wasn't driven much as I believe when the coolant froze, it cracked either head or block and it was followed with constant overheating, typical of the K-Series engine.

I'm going to skip the past four or so months as it was a complete mess when it comes to cars (more going backward than forwards), and since a few weeks ago I have made a stupendous amount of progress on the WK and MGF, which I will cover in the upcoming blogs.

1. I cut the corrosion out of the WK (in the footwell) and welded new metal in,
2. Changed the manual steering for PAS 'EPAS' (electronic) steering in the MGF,
3. Changed the interior in MGF for red/black leather seats, and red/black steering wheel,
4. Painted MGF's wheels black,
5. Failed MGF on MOT
6. Rebuilt calipers on MGF

I'll leave it there for now!

Big jobs pt1

The MGF has recently been throwing a load of stuff out of it's pram. It's barely been on the road, and now the water pump is leaking. Could not drive it at all, as topping up with water was a pain in the bum and possibly dangerous for the engine, so a month after it sprung a leak, I held my breath and did the neccessary belt removal to get at it!


These 16v jobs are easy, even in the ridiculously confined spaces of the F's engine bay. However, I managed to 'mess up the easy part' (tm D Blakeborough) and keep the cam locking tool on when trying to remove the crank pulley using the old (and useless) pressing the brake pedal down. The crank pulley moved, but the cams didn't, and it took about 10 teeth off the belt and -possibly- damaged the frickin' valves in the process! I carried on anyway, assuming there was no damage. Put the new pump in, new belt, timed everything up, started her up, and it's not firing on cylinder 4! Belt off again, timed up, and the cylinder is still colder than a Wizard's underpants. "JESUS" I thought, and then put off taking the flipping head off (as part of an UBER service), replacing valves, headgasket, inlet and exhaust gasket.

The 'replacement' valves - these are damaged! I can't tell!

So what was a basic 40 quid waterpump and belt service is not escalated beyond a 200 quid job, with special (and not cheap) tools I'll only ever (hopefully) use once. I checked the gasket, and it's in good shape. The dowels are also steel - they left the factory with plastic ones - a sign it's been replaced! The previous worries about overheating were possibly down to overfilling the the expansion tank. God knows with these cars.

Rewing about a month, the previous radiator had been replaced, as it had no fins left. They had all disappeared, and a trip to the scrap yard uncovered one that had a few more fins on for five quid. However, this one leaked and was falling to bits. I bent off the leaking rims, drove it for a couple of weeks, and thought I'm going to have to do this the proper way. So I put the new one in, and it still overheated (due to the water pump - which I uncovered by having a poke behind the belt cover).

And now we're at the stage where the head is off, I'm afraid to touch it as the valves close and open, but there's a strange white carbon deposit (is this normal?!) on the flat part. A kindly gent gave me his old valves to test in my engine - when I took everything off, I was expecting at least two to be bent over, but there is nothing. Like I'd replace a couple with the replacement ones, I think I'll actually buy a new set and then have someone put them in for me (while taking the tools I bought back to where they belong), and maybe skim the head if it hasn't already. Everything looks fine though. Touch wood, I might actually put the new gasket in, put the head back on, time it up like a pro, etc. I can't see any damage!

The head now sits in a big plastic shopping bag awaiting me to gather up the courage to fix it.

The other car, the Whizzkid has been performing superbly, apart from the ignition coil (original, 28 year old one) packed up. A new one was brought over by a colleague, and he even sorted my points out (shudder), and it's now running about 95%. He rocked the car back and forth while looking at the points in the distributor, which were then adjusted. Aparrently, they were closed when they should've been open. I am told I need a 'dwell meter' to get them 100%. These are ebay rarities, going for a few quid, or a motor factor jobby going for 50 quid. The car will be going away for the winter, and replaced by a rejuvinated black WOBster Astra, which is receiving parts from the red GSi, which I have now deemed 'served it's use' and has sat on my parent's drive for well over 6 months. The starter motor has seized, the wiring is playing up, and it's now time to go! :(

Li'l matey

I was hoping I would'nt regret this as I really want to put my Astra on the road again, funded with the sale of my last car, and then sort out my blackie Astra, but I think two Astras are far too much, and lack of funds do not contribute to still silly insurance costs and 101 pound tax every six months, and then there's £10 per 70 miles under current (and rising) petrol prices.

It made sense that my next car could be 1.4 or less, small, old and unsual, and even 'rare'. I excelled myself and found this:


It's a 1981 Suzuki Whizzkid. It is powered by an F10A enginein the back that has a capacity of 970cc, and an enviable power output of 47bhp through the rear wheels. It is also just over 600kg kerb weight, runs on tiny 12" wheels, and has a cubic foot of storage space (including the glove box) ... without the spare wheel.

I can say the performance is spritely, kind've like a mini, or a mouse across a kitchen floor, only better. Cornering is good, although any bump will result in a shortlived rolling about in a display of comedy proportions as it eagerly (and magically) corrects itself and continues on it's way. The ride is very good, for what it is, but every bump is amplified right through your arse. Speed bumps were but a twinkle in a council Hitler's eye, and this car leaps into the air like it had sat on a pin. It's not crashy like suspension is worn out - the dampers have limited travel and it just isn't too keen on typical cratered British roads.

Speed runs out at 95mph, but I doubt I'll ever reach that. I've hit 72mph through not trying. I've driven a Land Rover that had no poke over 40mph, and reaching 60mph took minutes. This is not like that - it rolls along to it's peak easily and without too much whinging from the engine. Changing through the four gears at full pelt takes ten seconds if you're looking after the petrol, but it allegedly redlines at 7,500rpm. I'll never take it there, I just don't want to break it!

So far, I'm very happy with it. It's nice to see such an old and rare car that's been so well looked after. It has minimal rust patches - if I could imagine the car in another way, it'd be rotten. I doubt it was rust proofed on export, so it's a little miracle - there are less than 47 cars in the UK (from an initial 7,000 introduced).

If I'm being picky, it needs bigger, wider wheels, just to improve cornering grip a bit. If it's going to lose it, I don't want to be in it! I have to re-waxoyl the underneath and general cleaning up. It's mechanically sound, and I want to keep it that way! The economy is superb. I've been everywhere, and I've knowingly put ten quid in every 120 miles when it reachs 1/6 tank.

I'm afraid to take it to bits, but I'll possibly clean up some components, as they could do with a bit of painting.

Christ, I am so sorry!

I have been really, really busy and sort of 'starting from scratch' with my cars, having done something I never thought I would!

In May I got rid of the Locost and all it's parts (including the engine! and wheels!). I saw it sitting there next to my Starion, and it was in the way. I had an offer, and I just took it and it was gone!

I then welded up the MR2 and stuck it on ebay. It sold for a bit more I sold it for (not recouping any costs of course). I presume the new owner broke it for parts, it had a really good engine and Koni suspension, etc. He could've tripled his money!

I then messed about with my Starion again. I changed the clutch release fork - not before having to take the gearbox out ... AGAIN, and getting covered in gearbox fluid. This stuff STINKS and will never come out of your clothes! Everything was bolted up and everything worked. Next thing was to get it back on the driveway and 'get it running!'.



To cut a long, long story short, I bought more parts for it, including everything that it could be, and I could not get it started. I got an offer and sold it in June 2009, again, for a bit more than I bought it for, but still cheap in comparison. What a confusing car that was, and what a huge amount of money I spent on it, the last amount of parts came to:

• Fuel Pressure Regulator
• Stainless Steel Braid Fuel Line
• Air Flow Meter with box, etc
• Super Unleaded

No more, the second I filled up the tank, cleaned everything, and tried to run it and it would work, it had to go.

I then went out and bought a Porsche 924 in late June. Possibly the best car I have ever owned. Apart from wear related to age (including a knocking coming from the back that I couldn't trace) and a number of electrical gremlins, it was faultless. I did 3000 miles nearly in a couple of months and even now it was a rare sight on the road and a 'headturner', even getting a comment about it being a 'shitty old Porsche'. I stuck an 80's Blaupunkt stereo in there, and removed it when I realised the speakers had long since perished. It had a bit of fiddling before I sold it in mid August when I sadly could no longer afford the petrol (although it was fairly cheap to run), the same couldn't be said about the insurance which was on 'classic' which cost me 120 pounds a year.

I am now back at square 2004 with a 1993 black Astra LSi and a flame pink 1991 Astra GSi. The former gathering a fifth yearly coat of dust in the garage with various Porsche and MR2 parts piling on top, the latter sinking on it's deflated tyres, circuitry waterlogged and malfunctioning, paintwork slowly succumbing to the rain, tree sap and sunshine. I have had an offer for it but I can't separate, although I should. It is now in the stages of needing severe care. I don't know what to label the black one - there's no doubt it will be in that garage way into the second decade.
I am selling the majority of my spare parts in my garage that I have blatantly been hording, and recycling the plastics (broken steering surround anyone?), including the 'smoov boot' that my Astra originally came with (free sale). The MGF is still here, I replaced the gear selector cable after it snapped when a stupid chavvy Aston Martin blindly and foolishly cut us up.

I am meant to be picking up a new/old car this week!

Sorry!

I have been away from the computer a bit. This is due to finding a job etc.

However, I am now back at the Starion - it's even up in the air with the gearbox out! I also have sold the Corolla and bought an MR2 mk1 - this has had 1/2 the work done already. It needs a bit of welding, and I'm not sure if it's worthy of the scrapyard at the end of the MOT (this month).
The MGF even passed it's MOT! Hurrah!

Unfortunately, it's bad news with the Locost Seven and the black Astra. I have decided the Seven has to absolutely go, and am selling it either complete or in bits, if I can manage to not get messed around with potential buyers. The black has to go as well unless I come into money asap.

I have a new forum!

http://nibi.co.uk/phpbb/index.php

It's called Old Mitsubishi Owner's Forum! This is to add support to non-existant UK support base! See you soon!

1984 Toyota Corolla 1.3 GL

I'm back now, I've had a little break from cars for the past month.

I saw this ugly 26 year old looking thing yesterday going for scrap metal money with road tax and MOT, and immediately wanted it.


It's 1298cc Toyota Corolla 'Liftback' on carbs. It has a brown interior. It is lacking creature comforts like air con, electric windows, power steering. In fact, it doesn't have a radio, and the wiring scares me. And it's green. Also, I haven't put any pics up of the REAR, because - goddamnit, it's beyond ugly, the ugliest rear end on a car I've ever seen.
Other than that, it drives perfectly, starts instantly on snowy, cold mornings, the ride is soft, it has no knocks, the bodywork is in A1 condition, and I think it's economical (though after 50 miles, it's not looking good from 3/4 to 1/2 tank). It also has those springy sofa like seats which I'm not used to.

Another thing is, the MGF finally passed it's MOT a couple of weeks ago.
The failing handbrake was beyond my control it would seem. I had -another- garage look at it, and they said it -might- be the brake pads and discs (which is understandable, with it losing the 'pressure'). So I did this, and then put it through the MOT at the garage that advised me. When I arrived, the man said 'it's failed on the rear brakes'.
ARGH! I could've just thrown that stupid car into the river. But then he said 'only joking, it passed'. Bastard!
I think it's now a problem with the MOT centre, and not with the car. Don't think I'll ever be going there ever again. What tester fails a car because the parking brake -WORKS- 100%, but is a few percent off the suggested level. It worked on the steepest hill I could find!

The brake discs were an utter pain to remove. Talk about 'corrosion', every nut on the back was stuck, but the brake discs were STUCK TO THE HUB! Literally welded with orange hatred.
I had to use an angle grinder, and a big hammer to crack it off. I thought I'd damaged the hub! It was a horrible job that need new bolts etc. The second side was easier as I knew what not to do. I cut a groove into the disc on both sides and drove a screwdriver into it with the hammer to crack the disc open like a nut. It worked, and everything was cleaned up and re-brakeified. This car has eaten up three cutting discs so far!


Prior to this, I drove down to London on New Year's Eve in the Astra. I never worry about the car on journeys like this, it's always proved to be fine in hot and cold weather over high miles, whatever, it just does it without complaining.
Not tonight though! While sitting in extreme traffic, I watch the temp gauge climb as usual. It was bouncing off 100 with the fan kicking in. However, one time it didn't bounce, and went right over. "The car is overheating" I said, and a minute later, I hear a WHOOOSH, assuming someone's crashed their car behind me right? The plume of steam that engulfed my car had me worried though. I lept out and pushed it to the side of the road with the assistance of some friendly Asian lads. "It's the head gasket," I though. I'm 200 miles from home on New Year's Eve, and my head gasket has gone.
I checked the oil cap. It was oily. I checked the expansion tank. It was dry, but no sludge.
Maybe I had been the luckiest man that night. A quick check with a torch, and I find a split pipe. Luckily again, I had my big tool bag in the boot. We were minutes away from a 24 hour Kwik-E-Mart place that sold big 5 litre bottles of water for 1.50 each. I bought two, repaired the pipe (it had split right next to the terminal - lucky), and filled it with water. I started the car up, and it drove again.

Returning to the car a number of hours later, I wearily drove the car home, keeping an eye fixed to the temp gauge, chameleon style. The heat from the vents was really hot, I had to keep the sunroof open to keep it bearable. Fortunately, the gauge didn't rise over normal, but it didn't stop me from being 100% paranoid all the way home. We pulled into a service station 100 miles from home to swap over, and it was then I realised I could change gear. It wouldn't even go into gear, the gear stick was loose like an arm, it could no longer be defined as a device to change gear with.
Once again, I lept out and examined the problem. The pin that holds the lever to the gear linkage had disintigrated. I despaired once again. It took 1/2 an hour to get it working again - I removed the pin that holds the rear seat in the hinge and it did the job. It didn't stop me from going through red lights to avoid changing gear though, I didn't stop until I was in front of my house.
Unlucky, but lucky I had the sense to take all my tools with me!! Amen.

I took all the interior out of the Astra as it was full of water. The holes in the bottom had lost a cap and had taken all the filthy water in over the past two years, so hopefully, it's now going to dry out.

Happy Christmas! FAIL

Unfortunately, the MGF DIDN'T pass it's MOT yesterday.
After spending nearly 800 quid on parts (the latest of which were brand new rear calipers at 100 quid each), it failed on:

• Lower arm mounting point on sill still corroded
• Handbrake still under efficency
• Steering arm ball joint had play

Including advisories on:

• Tyre worn
• Tyre worn
• Rear disc scored
  

So, everything is cured, apart from the things I didn't fix! It's odd that they didn't pick up the advisories from the last MOT? It's a frustrating and random experience MOT's, the testers are either incompetent or just Hitlers. The handbrake should've been cured, I couldn't even push the car with it on (opposed to my dad's Fiat which could), and the sill being welded etc still needs attention? Must be somewhere else.
I have further ordered new parts and will get welding that sill again! Really wanted it ready by xmas, but never mind.

I'm going to try and put the Starion into a garage and get that sorted as well, or get the Astra sorted.

7 day mission - fail!

Didn't get the car finished today, so won't be going into MOT tommorow!
Set about it today, with about 2 hours to do everything and the clutch master cylinder gave up. It literally didn't want to pump any fluid, after cleaning it out three times!
The flexi hose didn't work out either, it was too corroded on one end, so just used some solid brake pipe for now. It's a bit of a bodge!
Hopefully tommorow, I will get everything done for a Monday MOT. It's really, really, really pushing it now!

MGF Ball Joints pt.2

Yay, it's time to do the other side!!!
I had a lot of difficulty removing the wheel nuts for starters. Why oh why oh why do tyre fitters use an air tool to tighten them up? I managed to to destroy the nut and had to sacrifice a socket by hammering a smaller size onto it AFTER applying a blow torch to it for 1/2 an hour. Ridiculous. The wheel then refused to budge and required a load of boots to it to shift it. This put me in the mood and I went straight for the angle grinder in preparation.


It's a bad sign when nearly every single bolt/nut has had to have an angle grinder to remove. If it didn't come off or even slightly rounded, I went at it with the grinder of doom, I wasn't wasting 1/2 an hour trying to tempt these bastards off. It's either comply or die and luckily, EVERY bolt on this side stayed put and I killed them. MWUHA. MWUHAHAHA. MWUHAHAHAHA. DIE!! DIE!!!!!

DIE!

This only took half an hour with the added trouble of -putting it back together again-. I used new nuts and bolts in the process, destroyed two -somehow- as I went along.

I removed the bolt off the steering arm (this will probably rotate so clamp it shut with a trolley jack on a breezeblock). Tap it with a hammer to release the taper. You can now move the hub around freely without having to use the steering wheel. I attacked the bolt on the bottom of the hub that connects to the lower arm. If, like me, you have little patience, you will cut a big chunk of the nut with an angle grinder - this has two advantages:

1. You have a choice of going further and cutting the bolt in two,
2. The heat an vibration will free the 'lock' that corrosion has on it.
   

You should use new nuts/bolts anyway, so this is the way it should be done. The top bolt on the top balljoint is easily removed, it comes straight off. The bolts holding the ARB links, which are probably broken will be corroded, so cut straight through the middle with the grinder. MWUHAHAHAHAHAHA! I even cut straight through the rubber, sending plumes of black smoke out!!!


The top balljoint has a taper, and needs a bvalljoint removing tool to separate. I tried the first one - a fork type. This didn't work (as usual), so tried the screw type. This works, as usual. They separate with a crack, with the separater usually flying out, so it's best to cower away while you tighten it up. ;)

To remove the bottom, I hammered a screwdriver into the 'clamp' (you'll understand when you see it) and pulled the hub up. It came up first time, but the other side needed some pursuading (no, I didn't attack it with the angel grinder ;) ). Usually a bit of wiggling, and more hammering screwdriver. Putting on is a pain as you have to line the bolt up in the hole.



I used my MFKB tool to remove the top ball joint. This balljoint is screwed into the top of the hub, and it's a big, mean old bastard that doesn't want to budge. It's held in by a washer that is bent up to prevent it from unscrewing ... hahahaha, it's on so tight I don't think the collapse of a star will budge it. Here is the MFKB tool:

It's called a Stilson Grip and is a plumbers tool for releasing old nuts that have sat in water for decades. It is very old fashioned and refuses to take any nonsense from stupid, stubborn nuts and bolts and you can hear it calling them rude names as it unscrews them. If it could get anymore harder, I have attached an extension bar. I reckon it has more torque than any other tool available.

I've done this type of thing to release the top nut on McPherson struts - you put a big bolt through the hole in the desk and just undo the nut (as you can see in the above picture). It works on everything, but is tricky to seat the Stilson on the 2mm wide nut. Later nuts have a wider width, and tighten is just a reversal of removing (with less feelings of impending doom). Make sure you put the new washer on the ball joint and then tighten up to a similar amount of torque (just a bit less). Congratulations, you can now put it back in the car.



As the lower arm passed the previous MOT, I left the old one on (even though I bought a new one). I don't have time to change it (one day left), and have a shed load of things to do still.

I put the ARB links on both sides, and bolted everything up (having to cut a bit of length off the bolts to prevent the steering from not moving). Look, they're nice and shiny!! But the bolts are too long, and will 'foul' the hub as it turns! (cue angle grinder).

^ Actual 24 carat gold connectors ^

Trying to get one of those clutch flexible pipes is proving to be hard and expensive. A single 8 inch bit of rubber pipe costs over 50 pounds. It's identical to brake hose (which costs under 5 pounds). Since when did British cars have such expensive parts? I went to the scrappers who have a green MGF in. I took the hose off that (and a load of unions :D ) and he didn't charge me anything for it (as is looked in a sorry state). Hopefully, I'll get the unions off and clean it up, otherwise this will be post-xmas completion. :( I will probably end up paying that 50 quid in the end though.

There is not a lot to do now. It's the clutch hose and the little tiny bits of metal needed to weld in. I can't believe I was going to get charged 350 quid ... yes, 350 quid for this?! It has taken me 1/2 an hour (including welding and filling). I'll give it spray of 1 quid primer and 5 quid Halfords 'Nightfire Red' rattle can. I'm aiming for a Saturday morning MOT, which means going back to the same place as before (the place that made up most of the faults - and the reason I'm faffing about here). Hopefully it'll sail through. If not, Sunday is there, and Monday will sort it. Fingers crossed it gets through Saturday though (which is one day away).